Tuesday 3 October 2017

LEARNING ABOUT FALSE TWIN FLAMES


" A false twin flame experience is to prepare you for your true twin flame."

The universe awoke me to the twin flame side of life last year, end October 2016, when I met my twin flame.

The experience shook me to my very core, it was energetically so intense. We ticked every single box of signs of meeting your twin flame. My life made so much sense after meeting him. 

He completely acknowledged our connection and at one point even suggested that he wondered if we should get married. He learned about twin flames at the same time as I did. He wanted to see me as often as he could, we messaged each other all day everyday from morning to night.

We both felt like we were finally home.

After two weeks my fear levels started to kick in big time and then something shifted in him and I could feel that he was not wanting a me in his life anymore.

We cut communication with each other after 3 weeks of meeting. I tried to contact him again twice but he was not interested in our connection anymore.

Me being me, I embraced the healing with all of my heart and soul. I was thrown onto the accelerated ascension roller coaster and my goodness gracious me did I shed and purge and release. 

Everyday that I shed my past and my pain he was with me energetically. He was in my mind from morning to night and my soul never ever stopped missing him and the beautiful introduction we had to each other. 

But.....
Every single part of my being said that this man is all wrong for me. He was nothing that I was looking for in a partner because he dismissed me and pushed me aside like I never existed with absolutely no explanation whatsoever. 

So.....
Every single day I tried to fight him out of my head. I fought him non stop all day every day, because he felt like the opposite to what love should feel like to me.

I could not see how this was the love of my life. He wanted nothing to do with me.  

So...
I read everything I could to understand the journey and what I was going through. My accelerated healing process continued. 

I read a lot about how we only have one twin flame and that you are one soul split into two and that you can never separate energetically. This explained why I could not get him out of my mind and why I never stopped missing him.

This was a lovely romantic notion to me, but I could not understand why my twin wanted nothing to do with me, when we shared this phenomenal bond. And he had acknowledged it and felt it too. This confused the crap out of me. 

Anyway a few months down the line we saw each other again. I wanted to talk about the experience, and he didn't want to talk about it at all, he landed up giving me quite a tongue lashing and telling me how I don't feature in his life at all and that he doesn't want me in his life. 

It hurt from the perspective of the ultimate rejection is not being loved and wanted by your twin flame. But I could see that him not wanting me was a blessing because he was not the kind of man I was looking for. He treated me really badly and I deserved so much better. 

So....
We parted ways again....

He was still ALWAYS in my head from morning to night and my soul still missed him constantly, craving that initial bond....

Again, this confused the crap out of me because I didn't like who he was to me and I didn't want to be in a relationship with him and he very clearly didn't feel anything for me and didn't want me in his life.

One part of me wanted to run towards this man with all of me because he was my twin flame and our connection was so rare and beautiful and my soul loved him so much, it never wanted to be away from him. My soul wanted to relive the initial meeting again and again. 

The other part of me never stopped fighting the connection because it felt so wrong. He didn't want me in his life and I hated the way he treated me. How could I be in love with someone like this?

So....
After a few months I decided to pursue him, to love him regardless of him not loving me...I was drawn to him for a reason and I needed to obey this soul pull and see where it would take me.

So.....
I committed to loving him and I stopped "running".

We sort of became close, but I had to instigate all of the contact, he would very, very seldom contact me first. But it felt like progress in the right direction according to twin flame teachings out there. 

He said he loved me too and we shared some lovely moments.

I was still healing and shedding but in me I could still feel that he didn't want me in his life like I wanted him. 

So the Universe decided to give me a little bit of a wake up call...

My twin and I slept together for the first time, and he decided that he just wouldn't contact me after...then my period was late for the first time in my life, other than being pregnant. 

I can not begin to tell you how freaked out I was, I could think of nothing worse than having a baby with a man who wanted nothing to do with me. 

I had to contact him to let him know, to which he was cold as stone to me and never once showed any empathy towards me or remorse for treating me so badly and disrespectfully.

So....
18 days late and my period arrived! Relief! 

But....
Still I have this guy in my head 24/7 and my soul is still missing him endlessly. 

Seriously WTF!!!???

Again, I fought and fought and fought with him in my head to just get away from me and leave me alone.

I was then guided to research about false twin flames. And my goodness this experience ticked those boxes big time! We had an exact twin flame experience, but he did not reciprocate the love. 

This is not a normal karmic or soul mate connection because you have the whole twin flame experience! This is the mind fuck of it all. You really do think that this person is your twin flame, the other half of your soul. 

The only difference is that the love is not fed both ways. They will keep you on a string and lead you to believe through their words that they do love you and that the connection is real to them too, but they will have zero actions to follow up these words.

They will be emotionally unavailable, they will make excuses not to see you. You will always be feeling like you are not good enough. It will feel like you have to play games to not piss them off or offend them. You are always on edge that they will run again.

So....
I cut cords like there was no tomorrow. ( I had not tried to cut cords before because I had read that it was impossible and had believed this whole time that he was my twin flame.)

But....
The cords would not disconnect and the pull towards him felt stronger than ever. He was in my mind as much as when we had met and my soul still missed his so much. I craved connecting with him like we had when we first met.

I was beyond exhausted from fighting him inside me, I had fought him constantly and I figured that this man must then be my true twin and there is nothing that I can do to disconnect from him...I surrendered....

I completely and fully surrendered, all fight and resistance in me totally disappeared, I gave it to the Universe...

I loved him and he was going nowhere...

I even surrendered to the fact that he will never want me or love me, I cried a lot in this surrender, but I was done with fighting. The Universe wanted it this way and I was just going to go with the flow.

So......
I told him of my pain that I am eternally attached to a being who does not love me or want me and that it seems so cruel of the Universe to do this....he said that he can feel my pain and he then implied that I can disconnect from him...This was like permission for me....all pain and tears stopped immediately and I again did cord cutting....

I had to do it a few times, because the energetic cords and connection was plentiful, but I could feel them leave me.

For the first time since we had met my soul no longer missed him and he was no longer consuming my head.

He has not left me completely, but I feel so different now. I don't miss him anymore and I don't have any draw to contact him. I feel like I am my own person again. I no longer feel like I am connected to someone who doesn't want me. 

The experience of meeting him gave me awakening and opened up ascension to me. It taught me that I am capable of loving someone unconditionally. It taught me about self love at the deepest level. It opened up the whole world of twin flames to me and directed me to deeper healing.

I still love him and I always will. But I am no longer stuck in what felt like an obsession with the wrong guy. I feel free and I feel like me again. 

Sending all tons of love
Twin Flame Healing
xxx

P.S: To book an energy healing session with me or to book a session to discuss your situation please email twinflamehealing11@gmail.com or find me on facebook and instragram twinflamehealing1111




1 comment:

  1. I went through something very similar. I completely understand!!!

    ReplyDelete